Adjustments

Hi Everyone, This is Sibyl,

I get excited when I figure out how to
solve a bothersome problem. Once I get
it handled and hit my stride, my life feels
balanced and I begin to relax. It never
lasts. Something new always shows up,
demanding yet another adjustment.

Caregiving is a lot like skiing or riding a bike.
I am always adjusting to stay balanced and
keep my whole being flowing with the terrain
or I will go down in a hurry. Even when I
have a long way to go and feel as though
I am wearing out, the need for balance and
awareness continues. With practice, I learn
to manage my energy, stopping for rests or
pushing on as appropriate. I would like
caregiving to be easier, but I am glad I have
found ways to stay flexible and become skilled
enough to maneuver a rather bumpy ride.

Stephi and I have gone through so much together.
I treasure the tender appreciation we have
for each other. We have had to get used to
the changes in our relationship as her problems
have progressed and I became her caregiver.
This was not what we expected when we were
young. Our love and our resilience have been
tested on every level and we have scars to
show for it. Yet, we're here, still together,
still trying to find our way each day to make
things go as well as possible. We are like a
sculpture being shaped by our experience.
It is made of clay that has not hardened yet,
so we are still a work in progress. Will she
claim control for her life so that she may
make healthy choices for herself and live
the life she wants? I hope my strength has
inspired and that some has transferred to her.
I want her to be as happy and as
healthy as she can possibly be.

Love,
Sib